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Something that makes sense to a жид.
Yaakov
ivri2
Torah (Bible study) in Hebrew (Еврей, עברית) is fun.

The Torah of Moshe
is a Graceful Hind
and Gentle Doe.

Do you know WHICH sex the Torah of Moshe is?

Even Jesus married the Torah of Moshe in Hebrew
before he had a real live girlfriend if he ever
did. This marriage called a Bar Mitzvah, and a
male Jew takes an Aliyah עליה to the Torah of Moshe
when he "marries" it, usually just after the age
of 13 when he first gets two pubic hairs. Read
the Mishnah משנה.

Do you know WHY men love their wives?
Do you know WHY Jewish guys love Bible Study in Hebrew?

Can you figure out WHY it is lesbian for a Jewish
woman to take an Aliyah עליה to the Torah of Moshe?

Jesus did not remain faithful to the Torah of Moshe
after he "Married" it in his Bar Mitzvah. Not only
did he break Shabbat in public (10th commandment)
but he even told other Jews not to observe Shabbat.
Do you know WHY Jewish guys get angry when a Jew is
unfaithful to his "Marriage" to the Torah of Moshe?
Did you know that a Jew breaking Shabbat is liable
to be killed? Can you figure out why Jesus was
executed?

The Torah of Moshe said that G-d rested on Shabbat
the Seventh Day. Jewish animals had to rest too
according to the Torah of Moshe. Jesus said the
Shabbat was made for man, not man for Shabbat.
If that is true, why do Jewish animals, which
serve man, have to rest on Shabbat too? Even G-d,
who was around long before Jesus was born, had to
rest on Shabbat, the Seventh Day, after creating
the World.

When a Jew reaches the Age of Bar Mitzvah (13)
he gets to lay Tefillin תפילין. As part of the
process of laying Tefillin, he makes the name
of G-d on his fingers. As he does this he says

ארשתיך לי לעולם I betroth thee for ever.
ארשתיך לי בצדק ובמשפט I betroth thee in Righteousness and Justice,
ובחסד וברחמים loving-kindness and mercy.
וארשתיך לי באמונה I betroth thee in Belief,
וידעת את יי and "know" G-d.

Do you know what "betrothal" is?
Do you know exactly how Adam "knew" Eve?
Only Jewish men can "know" G-d that way.

Do you know WHY Jewish guys say when they have
a Bar Mitzvah "Now that I have become a man"?
Can you figure out WHY Jewish guys like taking
Aliyot עליות to the Torah of Moshe in Hebrew and
laying Tefillin תפילין on their heads and hands?
Maybe the fact that Tefillin תפילין are always
made of leather "helps" guys to enjoy laying them.

Do you know that Jewish guys recite ("sing") their
Aliyot עליות in a minor key? Do you know WHY Jewish
music is always in a minor key?

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